Wacky Prozacky

Well hell.
I think i am going through a "social" phase. this is ridiculous. I don't ever remember going through phases until the last 4 years or so, and now all of a sudden, i have divided these periods into phases.
anyways, i am such a hermit (a very happy hermit, i might add) that when i get in a social phase i think people don't know how to act.
i have a tendency to ignore (but not in a hateful way) people for the most part. i will always respond, but tend to fail to initiate any contact with anyone.
then i hit a social phase, and i call people, facebook, try to get out and visit or whatever; get away from bob n the kids, etc. usually i am successful. but i have been off work all week, my sis in law hasn't been responding to me, (oh just let me get started oon that!) and it's put me in a hell of a mood. i am trying really hard not to take it out on bob, but its very difficult. he's just there in the way of my pms attitude. but it's not PREmen. syn. cuz i just got done last week. it's maybe Postms lol
now about my sil; she lived an hour away, and we got along great. especdially when my other sil (her sis) and i fell out. she pissed everyone off, so it was like bren and i had something in common.
then bren had to move to my city. i was sooooo excited! i thought i was finally getting someone to hang with, that relly new me. she was like my best friend anyways, i thought this was going to be awesome!
then she moved here, and is using rae for the "free" apartment and whatever else rae can do for her, and i feel left out. bren and i haven't hung out for the 2 weeks she's been in town, at ALL. she doesn't even callme, except for once.
but now all of a sudden she is hanging out with rae, they talk, she's been having coffee with her, and their kids are playing a lot, having sleepovers. this really kinda pisses me off, cuz i feel left out. now i have the reasonable part of my head that says who gives a flying frack, they are sisters and grew up together and of course they are going to take this chance to reconnect.
but it still pisses me off a little. and my feelings are hurt.
i will get over it, but i just don't understand why it's so hard for an adult (me) to make friends at this age. i think something is wrong with me. ima freak.
maybe i need some drugs.
for real; everyone else is on them these days. am i depressed? are these swings normal???
i just had to get this off my chest. bob told me to fuck'em. lol pardon my language today.
but sometimes nothing else expresses quite like them.

this is me trying to dump this garbage.

have a good week, in case i withdraw and don't write on here for a few.